On Monday, I drove my daughter to high school in silence. Both of us were feeling the effects of grief. Our beloved grandfather/great-grandfather died on Saturday at the age of 100.
It wasn’t a surprise. He had been in the hospital three weeks before, where he and the doctors determined that he would go into hospice.
Glenn’s memory was sharp even at 100. He could remember details from decades ago about family, friends, and people he worked with as a farm manager. His attention to detail as a listener was a gift to others. People mattered to him and he was genuinely interested to know them.
I got to know Glenn over 25 years ago when I joined the family. He has been a precious part of my life. Erik and I had the privilege of living in the same city as him for the last 20 years. That meant he’d been there to hold our newborn babies, see their sports events, and teach them how to make his famous zucchini bread and cookies.
He was the best kind of role model.
Instead of giving advice, he showed what it meant to be responsible–within a family, with finances, within organizations, and with people who may need a hand until they get on their own feet.
Before he transferred into hospice, many of us were able to visit him to say goodbye. I held his hand and complained about how hard this year has been and that I didn’t want him to go.
His reply encapsulated his approach to life: “Life is good. Some days are better than others.”
This man lived through the Great Depression, wars, and many personal losses, including his wife, adult grandson, and oldest son. He also witnessed unimaginable innovations in technology, medicine, and transportation. Up until the end, he used email and skype to connect with family across the U.S.
Life IS good. He chose to see the good or to create the good.
From his childhood on a farm, he learned that life goes in cycles. Things are born and die. It’s not about whether we are ready for the season. The season happens. Then the next season happens.
Nature has its own wisdom that we can struggle against or accept.
Therein lies our choice.
Glenn was ready to go. He spent 3 weeks in hospice waiting for it to happen. I spent good chunks of that time angry that I couldn’t visit him due to Covid protocols. I imagined him being sad to be alone in his final days. Writing this now, I think of how silly I am. He was at peace with the circumstances.
His philosophy that “life is good–some days are better than others” went with the flow of life. That meant his energy was available to do the important things in life for his family, his community, and even strangers.
While I was in the car with my youngest, a text message notification broke the silence. Another adult grandchild shared a story about how her fellow teacher had made Grandpa’s special bread the night before and brought it to her classroom.
The kindness of that act brought tears to both of us. We were touched by the act even if we didn’t get to sample the sweets.
“Are you going to be okay?” I asked my teen.
“Yeah,” she replied. “It just can’t believe he is gone.”
On my way back home, I stopped at Starbucks to see if a little caffeine would help my headache (and heartache). I thought about the act of kindness by my cousin’s co-teacher.
While I sat in the drive thru line, I longed for the same comfort.
And that’s exactly what I received.
When I came to the drive-through window, the barista told me that the car in front of me had paid my bill.
A wave of tears and gratitude washed over me. I pulled into a nearby parking lot and let the act of love flow through me. Such kindness is a healing balm.
I’ve paid for people behind me before. We’ve all heard of “random acts of kindness.” Helping others when they least expect it feels really good. It makes your whole day feel brighter.
But I hadn’t been on the receiving end before.
How could this person—a stranger—have known how much I needed it?
The answer is that she didn’t. What she did feel was a nudge, a whisper from the Divine that she acted upon.
How many times have you felt that nudge? Have you ignored it or acted upon it?
My challenge for you today is to listen for the nudges and act on them. You never know when you are acting as the instrument of Divine Love.
While I was in the car with my youngest, a text message notification broke the silence. Another adult grandchild shared a story about how her fellow teacher had made Grandpa’s special bread the night before and brought it to her classroom.
The kindness of that act brought tears to both of us. We were touched by the act even if we didn’t get to sample the sweets.
“Are you going to be okay?” I asked my teen.
“Yeah,” she replied. “It just can’t believe he is gone.”
On my way back home, I stopped at Starbucks to see if a little caffeine would help my headache (and heartache). I thought about the act of kindness by my cousin’s co-teacher.
While I sat in the drive thru line, I longed for the same comfort.
And that’s exactly what I received.
When I came to the drive-through window, the barista told me that the car in front of me had paid my bill.
A wave of tears and gratitude washed over me. I pulled into a nearby parking lot and let the act of love flow through me. Such kindness is a healing balm.
I’ve paid for people behind me before. We’ve all heard of “random acts of kindness.” Helping others when they least expect it feels really good. It makes your whole day feel brighter.
But I hadn’t been on the receiving end before.
How could this person—a stranger—have known how much I needed it?
The answer is that she didn’t. What she did feel was a nudge, a whisper from the Divine that she acted upon.
How many times have you felt that nudge? Have you ignored it or acted upon it?
My challenge for you today is to listen for the nudges and act on them. You never know when you are acting as the instrument of Divine Love.
